There’s these two boys. Completely different yet so similar. I met One of them back in September of 2012. You see he was different from what I usually go for. Dark skin. Perfect teeth. Skinny. He was cute yenno? I think we started talking from one of those LMS statuses on Facebook . We start to get to know each other, we become friends, blah blah blah. I start getting this tingly feeling whenever he replies now. I’m looking forward to his messages now. He has a way of making me feel so special and like the only girl he ever wants. I’m telling my friends about him now, I see a future .. Maybe just MAYBE things will go my way and he’ll be my boyfriend . I mean he says he likes me and he’s not talking to anyone else yenno? I become a priority. So he says. Still yet to meet in person. But we have plans to do so soon. You see, about this one he’s one of the guys that every girl wants. Constant females drooling over him, all his exes want him back, he’s just that guy. He lives in another city a few miles out from where I live but I don’t care. Maybe he’s different than the boys in my city who isn’t shit . The distance thing was a big issue from day one but it’s only 1 hour by bus and 20 minutes by car so it’s not that bad right? We talk every day. I admit my feelings . I call him babe on accident which was totally on purpose . That’s where it all began .. We’re “talking” now but no one knows it. I’m the only one he talks to so he says.. There’s no one else so he says but there’s doubts. He’s still the perfect guy in the world to me at this point, still talking all day, still a priority in his life, I’m talking to the guy everyone wants … But I’m just Naja. I’m not good enough, how is this even possible? Surely he’d run once he finally seen how average I am. I’m living everyday like it could be our last time talking. September turns to October, and October turns to November. We’re better than ever. We’ve advanced to the point in our relationship where we Skype and see each other whenever he asks.. Because like the sad puppy I am, I jump at his command. He’s something I don’t deserve so I have to be what he wants. The jealously starts up, I learn about his exes and I’m going through the fact that other females are on him still .. He’s yet to make it know he’s with me publicly. But he posts sweet things on my wall , calling me babe in public, all the stuff. Everything I could ask for. November turns to December when he surprises me by showing up in front of me at my aunts. That night ill never forget we fucked and I swear we became one. From the head he gave me to the head I gave him to 69ing for like 2 hours.. It was everything I dreamed of. After 3 months of talking daily and me falling for him more and more every day he’s actually on top of me.. And behind me and inside me. That night was the night of a lot of firsts, and I layed there after all was said and done and prayed to god that I could be this happy all the time. Like if he could just fufiill that one prayer I’d be so happy.. After that day things started to change. He was busy more. I know he just got freedom back but he’d not message me as much. After I gave my Body to him in every way possible, I felt so hurt. How could the one person that I actually opened up to do such a thing to me? Especially after I let him know about all the times I got hurt in the past. So I tell him I felt neglected . He’d always come with some excuse to justify why he wasn’t talking to me Then talk to me till the night was over then the same thing would happen in the morning. Then he started the whole “I’m online on Facebook but I’m not gonna reply back to you ” thing. Then act like his phone died whenever he felt like talking to me. I was in turmoil inside. The insecurities set in long ago , I’m on his page 4 hour out the day twatching the shit out of him. Females were still there, I still was in the shadows. I felt like I was losing the best thing inn my life. December turned to January , then January to February . Nothing changed, I continued to be the downest female he could ever ask for. Faithful , loyal And literally down to do anything he said. We met up 4 times by now, he was always busy and never came to see me once .. It was always me going to see him. I didn’t care though, I just wanted to please him . February comes and he’s more distant than ever I’m figuring he’s gonna be gone soon and I hate it. He’s constantly on my mind. How can I make this work? Who is she? Then tragity strikes and he’s taken away from me. With a threaten that he’s gonna be gone for months.. Something happens, a total shift and I’m his girlfriend . After 6 months of basicly being his girlfriend I get a title. I’m so happy .. So happy. Then the stress sets in. Being the girlfriend of the guy that everyone wants is so stressful. Some female with a name similar to mines writes on his wall calling him hers. All my fears and suspicion has been confirmed . Then he’s gone for good. With her and there happy while I’m lost and confused trying to figure what I did wrong. The ending months I met a new friend on twitter. He’s not what I usually go for but his personality is amazing. He’s funny, he’s smart and he’s different. He becomes my bestfriend . Talking everyday, jokes till 3 am, he’s great. He helps me get over the first guy. We haven’t met in person but we established that we’re neighbors. We meet up one cold night at the train tracks and we talk for hours. I get cold and he gives me his jacket… The first time some guy actually did something like that for me. He walks me home, he’s difintemy my bestfriend and I see him as nothing more. Things start to progress one day when after hanging at his house for the first time and he kisses me. I didn’t really like it because hey, that’s my bestfriend . I start to love it. He taught me how to kiss just right to turn him on and we kiss in the rain.. Fast forward a few weeks we’re high in my living room and my moms not home.. I give him the green light and the sex is the best. We’re made for each other it seems. I’m falling for him and the thoughts of the first guy is almost gone . We’re like rabbits , and then he too gets too busy, unless he’s bored or horny I don’t hear from him. I know what’s happening too well and it hurts. Then the first guy comes back . I’m still in love with him. He act perfect again then his true colors start showing . That’s the guy I remember. I end up giving myself to him again in public then all over again he hasn’t in the we . But the second guy.. Both started acting different and here I am..